Welcome to our show, boys and girls! Today’s game is called
Disney World: Addiction Or Devotion?
Let’s meet our contestants. (Y’all, these are actual people
and real stories. They share information on the promise their real names would
not be used.)
Today’s first contestants, the Benjamins! The Benjamins are
in their upper 30’s, both work, no kids and consider themselves devotees to The
Happiest Place on Earth. They stay at the same place and eat at the same places
each time they go. Because they own a travel agency, they do get a few price
breaks but will spend approximately $3,000 for an 8-day trip that they take
once a year. Or twice, if the mouse moves them.
Let’s take a commercial break so that I can cuss the Benjamins.
My 4-day trip cost almost $3500, although I suspect the Benjamins don’t have
the same beverage bill that my wife and I are capable of running up.
And we’re back!
Our next contestants are the JJs, James and Joanne! The JJs
hail from Utah and are retired. While raising their three children, the JJs
always took their family vacations at either Disney Land in California or
Disney World in Florida. “The kids loved it, so it was a really easy choice for
us.” Now, the JJs are here once or twice a year on their own. They stay in an
off-Disney property to mitigate costs, but they generally do not worry about
expenses. They are devotees.
Let’s take another break while we ponder why a retired
couple in their 70s hops a plane twice a year in Salt Lake City and flies to
Orlando to frolic with Cinderella and Goofy.
Next, let’s meet the Double Ds. These people look normal: good
looking, gainfully employed, and like the Benjamins, also in their upper 30’s. They
however, have a child. They are looking forward to going to Disney World in
just a couple of weeks for spring break. It will be their 21st trip
(not a typo) to Disney World. The DDs also enjoy a financial break at Disney
World, theirs being a military discount. Still, for their 4 day stay the DDs
will usually spend well over $2,000. With a 6-year old child, they can be
forgiven for making Disney a regular vacation spot, but 21 times in 8 years?!? And
because they plan to renew their wedding vows at Disney World in a couple of
years, we have labeled them the Disney Dorks!
And now meet our final contestants. Ladies and gentlemen, please
welcome the STDs! Seriously Trained
Disney-ites. Looking like average people of a similar age to me and my wife, we
struck up a conversation with the STDs while waiting in line at the popular
attraction at Epcot known as Soarin’.
What we learned was that Disney World was every single vacation they ever took
with their children. In the first two years of retirement, the STDs made 12
trips to Disney World, at which point they decided to move to Orlando. They now
visit one of the Disney parks – Epcot is the favorite – two or three times a
week! And they love it. No golf, no tennis, no Europe, no Mexico… Disney World
is their world.
Stop the game. I
think we’ve found our winner.